Freak Friday
by dyingXdasies
Summary: All things carry the yin, While embrace the yang. Neutralizing energy brings them into harmony. A Gypsy casts a spell that switches Arnold and Helga's bodies. Will the blondes be able to figure out how to break the spell and swap bodies back or will they be stuck as each other forever? Can they survive the violent dangerous third party lingering in the shadows? Win some lose some
1. Chapter 1

At five in the morning she looked in her vanity mirror sighing to herself. Today was just another day in Hillwood. Her day would consist of cooking, cleaning, and tending to all the tasks in her home that would otherwise be neglected, just like she herself was neglected. She took the yellow tinted concealer dabbing it at her jaw line to cover the purplish bruise developing there. Helga Pataki had a lot of bruising and a lot of scarring. Helga was scarred to say the least of her problems.

Helga stared into the mirror sapphire eyes gleaming with confident ferocity as she took note that the bruises blended away in her ivory skin. Someday she'd have to send a thank you note to whoever had created Maybelline Make-up. She tugged at a platinum-ironed curl; tucking it into a long ponytail that cascaded down to her lower spine. Helga wasn't one to normally dress up, but she was taking her English teacher's advice to the class seriously. The teacher had explained to the class the will power of positive thinking. If you force yourself to look at the glass half full then you'll stop believing it's half-empty. `

So that was why Helga wore a bright pink bow, in her pale blonde hair, as a headband. She'd even gone as far as to wear a tight hot pink miniskirt with a black top matching leggings and pink heels. Helga was definitely on the positive side today. Pretty in pink verses her usual rock and roll look of pretty in punk. Today would be a great day at the Cheese Festival with her best friend Phoebe.

She considered the exact words the teacher had offered up to recite. With as wide of a smile Helga could muster she looked in the mirror and recited the phrase with as much charisma capable.

"Today is going to be unlike any other day in my teenage life!"

At five in the morning he looked in his bathroom mirror as he combed his cornflower hair. He tried to tame it but it appeared to have a mind of its own whirling and twirling in random directions. He woke up on the wrong side of the bed so to speak that morning. He did not look foreword to spending his day fist fighting and hustling rent from the other boarders in his house. He didn't want to journey all the bus stops to obtain his dying grandparents medication. He especially did not care to council and advise the neighborhood through shallow dilemmas as he did every damn day. He would though because Arnold Shortman was mister fix it even if he couldn't fix himself.

He sighed as a pair of aggravated Jade eyes examined him in his reflection. He continued to shave his strong jaw line. He always felt better after obtaining a good clean shave and removing all his five o'clock shadow. He'd grown into his head and his body too. He was 6'2 and masculine from all the baseball and sports he participated in at school. Arnold was a man's man and a ladies man to boot. He didn't have a girlfriend but there was definitely a flock of girls awaiting their chance.

He could hear his grandpa Phil coughing briskly through the paper-thin walls. Phil was putting up his best fight but cancer was clearly winning. Arnold tried to tune the sound out. His mind lingered back to his English teacher's concept. If you continue to look at the glass as half full it won't conclude to be half-empty to you. It was easy to verbally state positives but it was a difficult task to believe it too. However he had some optimism since he and his best friend Gerald would be heading to the cheese festival together later that night.

Arnold's green eyes boldly glared into his mirror. In Arnold's deep calm voice he recited his teacher's advised phrase word for word.

"Today is going to be unlike any other day in my teenage life!"

THE CARNIVAL

Helga latched arms with Phoebe as the petite Asian woman led them through the crowed tugging at her blue dress excitedly. The sounds of laughter and shouts morphed together in an exhilarating sound. People jumbled together anxious to ride the rides and try different textures of cheese.

Helga beamed truly happy. She could live here in this festival year round. Maybe in a year when she turned eighteen Helga would flee and join the carnival as they traveled the U.S.A. sharing cheer and cheese. She glanced at her best friend who was truly pretty. Phoebe tugged at her long brown locks of hair that laid against the sides of her face a dark curtain. She wore a short blue dress and matching flats with tiny blue bows on them. Both had gotten dolled up for the evening events. They were friends for life and thick as thieves. They were polar opposites fueling each other with the traits that they lacked but needed in their lives. Helga would gladly bite a bullet for Phoebe.

"May I cut in?" Came a deep smooth caramel voice. Helga smirked as Phoebe's face lit up a million watts before spinning around. "Gerald!" She squealed leaping into her boyfriend's arm. He was handsome his skin a flawless creamy chocolate. He sported his usual solid red pull over and slightly sagging skinny jeans. They were an adorable couple.

"Aw, how cute. It's so adorable, I could throw up in my mouth." Helga joked putting her index finger to her lips to imitate gagging herself.

"Pataki." Gerald chuckled.

"Johannson," Helga nodded her head laughing too.

Helga and Gerald had grown up together and were close friends. They teased each other maliciously but if anyone else so much dared to say anything other then themselves they'd knock that person out no questions asked.

"Hey Helga," Arnold smiled his wide toothy grin.

"Hey Arnold," Helga returned his smile casually.

"How's Wolfgang?" Arnold asked casual about Helga's current boyfriend.

Helga was an attractive girl and Wolfgang was not her first boyfriend he'd just happened to last longer then some of the others had. Arnold was a Casanova himself dating a new girl every few weeks. Helga assumed that it was because he really wanted to be with Lila Sawyer not them. Even after being friends with Lila for as many years as Helga had her nose still crinkled at the thought of the pair together.

"He's fine building a motorcycle lately," Helga didn't mention how he'd been spending more time with the bike then her.

"How's Ruth?" She mused continuing on with the simple talk.

"We broke up." Arnold replied simply.

"How come? Finally realize she's superficial have you?" Helga rubbed in.

"No, she's not my type. I prefer light haired girls." Helga frowned at the shallow response.

"I guess we can't all be red heads." Helga mocked. His eyes slanted agitatedly at her.

He'd chosen to change the subject rather then take the initiative to argue with her.

"Looks like we're on our own," Helga pointed to the empty space between them. Phoebe and Gerald somewhere in the conversation had sneaked off to exchange private smooches.

"Shall we then?" Arnold extended his arm out to escort Helga.

She shrugged: "What the heck why not." Helga placed her hand lightly on his arm.

On lookers would have believed that the pair of old friends were a couple the ways the pair teased and played around. They rode bumper cars clashing cars together every chance they got. Arnold won Helga a bear; so she split her cheese stick with him taking turns nibbling on the deep fried treat. Finally they peered curiously at a Gypsy tent.

"Come in children." An elderly woman beckoned. Apprehensively the two entered the tiny tent. It was enveloped in the smoke of incenses. "Sit down." She instructed and the two sat beside each other. "What brings you to my shop?" The old woman leaned towards a crystal ball in front of her peering knowingly. "Nothing did, you told us to come in here lady." Helga was annoyed she was obviously a phony.

"Helga, do you really have to jump ship? Give her a chance." Arnold countered.

"Talk about jumping ship, you can't commit to anything Arnold-o!" Helga countered back.

"Name calling real mature Helga I could have sworn we were seventeen not nine." Arnold retorted cool toned.

"Arnold you act like you know me but you know nothing. You're head is in the clouds most days anyway." Helga was growing temperamental forgetting all about the old lady in question that started the argument. Why was her and Arnold's relationship such a tipping scale from positive to negative?

"The truth can be disgusting and crude but if the boot fits." Arnold glared down at Helga's heeled boot.

"Well I oughta pound you Football head!" Helga roared.

He laughed at her. "You do realize you're like 100 pounds and 5'4 right?" He teased amused.

"Helga just stop just for once be civil." Arnold attempted to reason. Helga wanted to reason but she was hotheaded by nature and he'd already ignited the match of frustration in her.

"Why don't you let loose for a change Arnold. You're boring." Helga glanced at Arnold with narrowed eyes. "Helga you couldn't deal with my day to day if your life depended on it."Arnold's nerves slowly beginning to get the best of him. Both glared nose to nose angry.

The old woman cleared her throat and both gave their full attention glancing at her blind eye. "I can help you two." She smiled, "I know why you were brought to me now." Her teeth gleamed slightly sinister. "Here we are," She handed each of them a box. "The fair will be closing soon I really must be closing my tent down. Have a good evening children." With that the old gypsy shooed the two out of her tent. Both still angry went their separate ways home.

Helga tentatively opened the box as she began to walk home. She pulled the string open peeking inside the brown box. There was a white ornament clearly resembling yang from Ying and yang. Her fingertips brushed the ornament lightly. There was a script on the back of it.

_All things carry the yin,_

_While embrace the yang._

_Neutralizing energy brings them into harmony._

Helga re-reads the strange quotation. Little did she know Arnold was examining the Ying symbol in a similar small container a few blocks over. Both went to bed exhausted and well beyond confused.

THE NEXT MORNING

Arnold awoke to a heavy pressure settling uncomfortable on his chest. He rolled over stretching as he pulled the sheets back. He lifted to his feet puzzled as the weight over his chest did not loosen but grew heavier. Arnold looked down and bit his tong to suppress yelping out in shock. A full well rounded bust met his eyes. He tried not to panic about the fact that he'd somehow had a pair of double D's. His bladder quivered signaling he needed a bathroom. He ran out of the room he was in without examining his location.

He was relieved to discover where ever he was the room was straight across from the restroom. Arnold bolted inside the bathroom locking it behind him. He ran to the mirror and bit his inner cheek. He could taste the metallic flavor of blood. He couldn't explain it but the taste was as foreign as the face reflecting back at him. A pair of azure eyes peered widely at him. He tugged roughly on the pieces of long hair tickling his waist. To his horror a curvaceous blonde stared back with the same horrorstruck expression he could feel himself making.

He pinched his chest in disbelief cringing as pain shot through his body; or rather the body of Helga Pataki. He didn't know how it had happened but it wasn't a dream he could pinch himself awake from he was trapped in Helga's body. He couldn't prevent it any longer. Arnold screamed on the top of his lungs. A high pitched squeal is what greeted him and the higher voice only served to amplify his screaming as he ignored the pounding fist on the other side of the door.

ACROSS TOWN

Helga woke up to a sharp poke at her stomach. The sun shone vividly through the ceiling, which confused her since she'd put a sheet over her corner window to keep it dark all through the day. She glanced over and next to her on a couch instead of Phoebe was Gerald. Did Phoebe sneak him in her bedroom last night? She'd have to scold Phoebe later as she rolled off her stomach that poky feeling still present.

Helga swallowed down the scream itching to escape her lungs. As she looked down hidden in the confines of a pair of red plaid boxers was a bulging clearly all-male asset. Helga stumbled to her feet almost loosing balance; the universe around her seemed to be higher up then she'd recalled her vision of it yesterday.

With quivering legs she stumbled to the restroom connected to the bedroom. How did she get this foreign piece of her somehow new anatomy to go down? The answer came at once as she cringed listening to the sound of dreadful coughing. There was a disconnect somehow. She'd gotten rid of her little problem but there was still a disconnect. Somehow her soul was disconnected from the mind and body it inhabited. All she knew was something about the coughing triggered sadness in this body she had yet to be brave enough to examine and investigate.

She looked straight across to the mirror beside the old bathroom stall. She yelled and the yell was a deep base sound that she could not associate as her own voice. A pair of Jade eyes widened in surprise as she tugged anxiously at cornflower blonde hairs. She was no longer Helga but somehow on the outside had become Arnold! She had inexplicably swapped bodies with Arnold!

She quieted herself as Gerald swung the bathroom door open to put his hand on Arnold's shoulder. "Arnold my man are you alright?" Gerald said concerned. "No I'm not I-I-I," Helga couldn't even finish the phrase. How could she explain that she wasn't really a he at all? Her frantic thoughts only grew more hectic as she heard screaming from a far away distance. "Gerald did you hear that?" She shook her head still unsettled by her newly found low monotone.

"Hear what Arnold?" He raised his brow perplexed. Helga didn't seem to have the capability to speak. Maybe she was going through shock? Somehow in the distance she heard a woman screaming bizarrely. Helga couldn't explain anything happening to her but she knew the sounds of that scream it was her own. She somehow could hear through the distance herself screaming. She was definitely in for an experience of a lifetime if Helga could live through the sanity; or should she be calling herself Arnold now.

WRITER NOTE: Thank you to all those who read and review this. I am currently the writer of 13 Reasons why and If you haven't checked it out then I suggest you do so! I will not post without a comfortable amount of replies. So speak now or forever hold your peace! Happy Readings!


	2. Chapter 2

WRITER'S NOTE: I hope that the perspectives don't get confusing! When I thought of this story plot I hadn't considered how difficult it would be to write about someone in someone else's body in a way that would make sense to the readers. So bare with me but still be honest if I've lost you guys. I'm hoping you guys enjoy reading because I live to write. I feed off your reviews so if you like then review people!

CHAPTER 2

SONG ABOUT A FRIEND

"I'm starting to figure him out. I know he isn't what I should care about. But whenever he reveals something about himself to me; I know we're meant to be."- Francine Chare

Helga sat on the bus doing what she did best under pressure; running away. She was still wrapping her head around the fact that her body was no longer her own. Everything responded late to her thought process. Almost as if Arnold's body still continued to function separate from her. Yet, though his body appeared to think separately from Helga with focus she could control it.

It was his feelings that were a whirl. She would feel his emotions instantaneously it was out of her control. Often times a memory would latch its self on to the feeling. The images reflected like a film before Helga and it intrigued her to spy on Arnold's memories through his perspective. She couldn't quite describe what switching a body with someone was like; it was a phenomenon that was indescribable and barely tolerable to her.

She wouldn't be able to manage seeing herself and acknowledging that Arnold inhabited the one thing that had solely belonged to her, her body. Suddenly Lila stepped on the bus and Helga braced herself for the flood of love that she knew would wash over her new body. The flood did not come; there was nothing. Just the platonic affection you feel for a dear friend.

Helga wondered whom he did want. An image began to appear and then: "Wow!" Helga heard Arnold's low voice respond to her secondary feelings. His mind had shut down completely! Completely and utterly fought off the intruder, intruder being Helga. She felt like she was trapped with the enemy. Almost as if Arnold's mind saw Helga's soul as a parasite or virus to counter off. His body knew that Helga was not the usual soul inhabiting it. His body was much like his heart. Arnold's body hadn't tried to purge Helga out from it yet. Simply when his mind had no desire to share something with her she'd see a flickering glimpse and then the image would close off completely. By the feelings seeping towards Helga from the almost vision of Arnold's crush, she could tell it was a big secret by the way his brain responded. The way Arnold's heart had began to hammer just at the thought of possibly thinking of the girl indicated that it was perhaps his biggest secret. It made the Nancy Drew in Helga even more curious to crack the case and discover whom this mystery girl was.

Helga sighed, a deep gravelly grunt as she returned to glaring out the window so that Lila would know not to start conversation. She dug through the pockets of his faded slightly baggy skinny jeans. She had to admit Arnold had his own unique "swag" as Gerald called it. She pulled out an I-pod from his pocket and curiosity enticed her. She knew that Arnold, Gerald, Patty, Stinky, and Sid played in a band. They did a lot of local shows and were popular in the area. They did verities of music to include all the members tastes which made them even more popular amongst all genre of music listeners. They made CD's the works. Helga hoped that maybe their new releases would be inside the contents of the music player.

She took the red earplugs and slipped them in her ears. She pressed the button turning the device on and was taken aback. It was all Arnold's own music but not from the band as she had anticipated. Just like Helga had her little pink book of poetry it appeared Arnold created songs. Admittedly over the years her books had become fewer and farther in between as she dated other people. Whoever this mystery girl was she was obviously the love of his life. Thousands of songs like diary entries were downloaded inside to vent his feelings for her.

They seemed to feature some of the band members but as Helga pried into his memories it was apparent only he and now she too knew about this I-pod diary. She picked the last song he'd written before the peculiar body swap. She felt naughty knowing she was about to pry into his deepest thoughts but Helga was a bad girl she knew this and could not resist. She'd always wanted to know who he was underneath the calm facade and now Helga could. He'd entitled it a song about a friend that featured Patty in the beginning. She stretched out Arnold's long legs tilting his head out the window as she pressed play. She smirked as he began to play piano music with a tinge of modern, yet jazz type beats shut the rest of the world out and sucked her into the song.

"I didn't say nothing." –Arnold "Yes you did what?"-Patty

"_I didn't say nothing."_

"_Yes you did." _

"_No I didn't!"_

"_No, you didn't say nothing, you just looked at me funny like I'm some kind of freak!"_

"_No I.. I didn't say nothing!" pause, "I didn't look at you.." _

"_Yeah you looked at me.." _

"_No." _

"_Yeah you did." _

"_What do you mean freak?" another pause, "Whose this one about?" _

Helga glared as the buildings moved further back from her. She was hesitant now. Obviously these lyrics would be more impacting then she'd anticipated. How many layers could one boy's soul have? By the sound of his intro many. She was trapped inside his body and still felt his inner workings were that of an absolute stranger.

"_These headphones keep me from rememberin' (rememberin')Also guilty of letting me not forget (also guilty)What type of harvest will September bring? (beckoning)Everyone to put him to that test (Somebody please kill me)I've got a sickness, it feels like love. It's not contagious, take off the gloves. Drop your defenses, apply a coat of perfect. I'll form the sentences you try to interpret. It'd all be so simple if I was rich (But I'm not)But I'm not so I compensate with thought (I got a lot)I got a lot of nothin' that you need to know (Ay yo)You would think he wasn't aware of the glow (Where'd you go?)Swimmin' in a bottle of imposters._

_Losin' my ground in the name of takin' it farther. We can thumb wrestle or we can make a daughter, I thought it was supposed to get easier when you worked harder. Stole the city, I still feel helpless_

_Baited the hook and caught me a shellfish (selfish?)I'm gonna gut it, clean it, cook it, feed it to a she_

_And see if I can get her to need me."_

Helga took a deep breath. His mind flowed in and out of thought. His mind continuously fluttering in and out of poetic concepts. He was a walking artist and it reflected in the flow of his rap. Who would have thought that though with several different methods were both poets? Now Helga could understand why Arnold's mind wandered into a dream like state often times. His daydreams numbed him from his grievances in reality. Helga was beginning to hate this anonymous girl as Arnold's depression began to suffocate her. She brought quite a deal of pain to his already strained life. Yet Helga could not bring herself to pull the headphones out from her ears. He spoke with flamboyance as he told his warped love story.

"And now I'm standin' at the bottom of the steps,

_And if I tilt my head a little I can look up her dress,_

_And I'm willin' to bet that she'd move if she knew,_

_So I'ma tap her on the shoulder, I'ma give her a clue."_

Arnold's mind flickered to a memory of silk black boy shorts with frilly lace. The girl had to be a local around here because those panties were only sold at one of the upper scale shops in Hillwood. Rhonda had forced Helga along many times. He was curious about what laid underneath mystery girl's underwear. Being the gentleman that he was he nudged her leg so that she would tilt her body in a way that concealed her from him. Her dignity meant more then his desire.

"_All it takes is a stroll down the street. A pro and he greets and he sold the life to me. Showed you the meaning of the artery he keeps on the end of his sleeve. As he pretends he can breathe, Lend me a piece of your superiority. I feel alone on this mission, I'm wishin' there was more of me. A pair of me, apparently I'm a parasite caught inside a paradox, A paradise, a parody, the hair police have got what you need For you to get over me and move on with Godspeed. I'd let it all go and break eggs for a livin'If I wasn't so conditioned to just take what I'm given. Get it, got it, catch it, caught it, and lost it, Yet I can't stop it, it's embedded in my optics." _

"_Plus the frustration is a product of the gossip. If you can't walk away can you at least change the topic? Overextended the amount of time allotted. Broke the engine, I don't know, cracked the block._

_Now I'm standin' at this gravel roadside festival. And I ain't tryin' to move cause this view is incredible; Standin' at the bottom of the steps. And if I tilt my head a little I can look up her dress And I'm willin' to bet that she'd move if she knew, So I'ma tap her on the shoulder, I'ma give her a clue."_

Helga was astounded. Arnold spent his everyday life a walking glowing bask of sunshine. Everyone adored Arnold. Arnold was cheerful, persevering, and the eternal optimist, for everyone who knew him. It bothered Helga that he could so easily sacrifice himself with his heart on his sleeve for everyone else; everyone except himself. Her eyes pooled at the corners and she exhaled deeply. The last thing she wanted to do was ball like a baby with a grown man's body.

"_Fall in love with all of she (Fall in love with all of she).Hasn't stopped callin' me (Hasn't stopped callin' me). Message in a bottle (There's a message in a bottle).And I stepped inside a pothole (I stepped inside a pothole).Somehow forgot my name (Somehow forgot my name).Blew out the flame (She blew out the flame)._

_A means to an end (A means to an end).Can't even be friends, it's a song about a friend!_

_She's still in my dreams (She steals all my dreams).Angel spread your wings (Angel spread your wings)._

_Tryin' to comprehend (I'm still tryin' to comprehend).Can't even be friends, it's a song about a friend!"_

The piano and drum beat carried out with the faint sound of background noise a t.v. maybe? Helga tugged at the blue sock cap she had placed over his head. Arnold's cornflower hair wrapping around the beanie. She wasn't sure where her runaway destination was. She'd chosen to follow her new body's instincts. She took the bus that her long legs carried her towards. She stumbled clumsily still unadjusted to Arnold's rather large feet. She Glanced uncomfortably at his red high top Converse. She didn't play another song letting the static seep into her eardrums as knots twisted in her stomach. They were secretly two peas in a tragic pod.

The bus stopped and Helga stuffed the I-pod into her back pocket to hide for safekeeping. She would brave to venture it further later. She found herself across the way from a man made lake. She waltzed towards a willow tree that Arnold preferred to sit under well pondering the philosophies of life. She thought she was deep, well, Arnold's inner thoughts made Helga feel like her emotions were a kid pool; and she had yet to dive into more then one written song. She wasn't sure what to do but the last thing she was ready for was to face her reflected in his eyes.

A part of Helga feared what Arnold considered her to be like. No one knew who Helga really was and she'd set it up to be that way intentionally. Yet, the thought of Arnold seeing her in a bad light devastated Helga. Helga thought she'd moved on from Arnold for the most part as the years had passed. Apparently she would always be imprisoned to her unwanted emotions for him. She realized she was imprisoned by love being quite literately trapped with her long pined for lover. She wanted her body back but could not face the reality of it all in order to get to the point of return.

She unbuttoned her red plaid shirt as the sun beat down on her. She began to sweat slightly and it was strange to not smell her cherry blossom deodorant. Instead she was wafted in a fresh masculine musk with a hint of delightful citrus. What was that smell? Arnold always smelt clean and crisp setting her senses on edge every time she caught a whiff of him. Maybe she would find out given her bizarre predicament of becoming him. She pulled at the blue wife beater hoping to create a slight breeze. She'd kept his boxers from last night on changing into random clean comfortable clothes. She'd been tempted examine him further but hadn't had the time in her rush to escape Gerald's puzzled stare.

She lost her jumble of thoughts as Arnold's heart clutched. Helga snapped her head up as she approached the tree. She saw herself already standing underneath the lowly curved branches of the willow tree. His heart was hammering and Helga was sure it was do to the fact that her nerves were sending his body terrified signals. She backed up ready to run for it the mixture of her thoughts and his thoughts too much. Helga was only one person that the universe had somehow now forced to be two. Just as she was about to bolt for it she heard her own voice only in a more timid demeanor.

"Helga come sit with me it seems like we have a lot to talk about, and a lot to figure out fast." The world seemed to be on Helga's shoulders and as Arnold spoke in her own raspy female voice she sighed dragging his feet towards herself. There was no escaping it. The lyrics from his lament still buzzing around in her

thoughts:_ I feel alone on this mission, I'm wishin' there was more of me. A pair of me, apparently I'm a parasite caught inside a paradox, A paradise, a parody. _Helga shivered shoving an unwelcome thought to the back of her head. How long could their physical being handle two separate souls inhabiting them? What if they never went back to normalcy? What if they were trapped as each other forever? She braced herself for the inevitable conversation that was about to come with Arnold; or should Helga actually be saying in literal terms the conversation coming from her? 


	3. Chapter 3

WRITER'S NOTE: Hope that this written prospective will be easier to understand then the first chapter. Here you guys have it! Another but short post. I am working on the next post for 13 Reasons why and guess what guys it's a tape chapter so if you're reading that story be excited, cause I'm excited for who the next tape is about! This story right here though will also be taking twists and turns. As always if you like review because how am I supposed to know I have readers if they don't respond. Happy readings loves!

CHAPTER 3

Franky G.

Anna (in Tess's body): "You mean we're like stuck in this SUCKFEST?" Freaky Friday 2003

I was nauseated as I dry heaved stumbling through the nature sight. I was ensnared in a trap, trap being, Helga Pataki's body. Her body did not react to the intrusion of my soul well. Just like her body's usual inhabitant it was ornery and domineering. Her brain seemed to subconsciously trigger an attack. As far as her body was concerned I was an illness Helga needed to sweat out entitled Arnold fever.

I was nervous and that didn't help, well I tried to fight the fever Helga's body induced in an attempt to kill off the virus. I had no idea how to explain that I was a human soul to what would be an inadement object if it weren't for my interference of keeping it moving. I feared if her body did expel me from it, without being able to switch back, Helga would either die as well or be trapped in my own skin forever. I had to find her and figure out a solution but I couldn't. I was too weak for a manhunt so I went somewhere peaceful in an attempt to lighten my burden.

I stood under the willow tree and suddenly I wasn't as queasy. I looked ahead, and there she was as if my body had done the manhunt for me just tugging her soul along for the ride. Go figure, I appeared on the outside to be in perfect health; no signs would lead someone in the direction that I was no longer inside my own body. I was too nice, once I was myself again I would have to work on that a bit. It was then I spotted my own masculine lengthy figure attempting to back track away from the area I stood in. ""Helga come sit with me it seems like we have a lot to talk about, and a lot to figure out fast." It was awkward staring on as my own Jade eyes narrowed and my own rose petal lips curled into a scowl. She sauntered over plopping under the willow tree next to me.

"Football head first things first; if you dared to look at me and touch me naked I'll kill you!" My head though still rounded was not as intense. I scrunched my nose slightly pissed off to hear my own voice lashing out with the ridiculous ridicule of football head that she'd clung to over the years. "Yeah tell me about it your body has done nothing but try and kill me all morning." I snapped off a little bit, my composure slipping given the bizarre circumstances. "What?" Helga spluttered and I was taken aback not used to my own voice rising in decimals while communicating. "No I just saunter around town throwing up blood to amuse myself." I replied coolly and it was even stranger to hear Helga's voice speak in my own personal calm, yet, passive aggressive tone. "Arnold, you walked outside with my pajamas still on!" She continued to scold in my own deep monotone. I looked down. I wore a pink pull over covering the fact that I hadn't dared to put a bra on, matched with black pajama shorts, and pink ballerina slippers. Only Helga would care about minor side issues in a catastrophe. Why was I friends with this crazy blonde to get myself into this situation in the first place? I knew; because since I could remember, even digging down to the oldest of memories Helga was always right there, I didn't know any other way then our psychotic friendship.

"Are you kidding me!" I exclaimed and a group of children playing catch snapped their heads over curiously. "Arnold I never wear that much pink in public I look like little Ms. Princess." She reprimanded. That's it! I had it with Helga! I'd had enough of her none sense since the fair. I snatched her up by my blue shirt pulling her down to my newfound height of 5'4. "Listen, we are going to have to stick together through this. If you want to ever control your closet wear again then I suggest you help me figure out how to swap back. I think I'll be okay I'm feeling better since you got here. I think your body senses something, or me. Either way though we better figure it out before its permanent." I cut to the chase uncomfortable that for once in my life I didn't have all the solutions to a problem.

"We have to go back to that ancient bitty. I say we slap her around a bit and make her reverse the spell." Helga conceded in her vigilante devil-may-care way.

"Spell?" I was puzzled even as Helga I was puzzled by her train of thought, she was always unreadable.

"Yeah, spell, obviously she pulled a freaky Friday on us." She rolled my green eyes for effect.

"Pulled a freaky Friday? Elaborate." I prodded.

"You know did some voodoo, twirled her magic wand, and Tada now we've swapped bodies." Helga waved my brawny arms around to empathize. Seeing myself through her perspective took me by surprise. I was much bigger then her if I embraced her I'd cover her whole fragile frame.

"Well the next carnival isn't for another two weeks and it's six hours away. We'll have to save up some money and ride a train." I was comforted as my mind reeled on to conclude a solution a familiar habit in an unfamiliar position.

"Yeah because your old ass Packard and my tore up Nova can really make a grand trip out of Hillwood." She scuffed just as I anticipated she would. She was always the only one to ever go against the grain of taking my advice. Always wanting to do it her way now would be no different. Just as always we would have to confront a battle amongst ourselves meet in the middle and become closer for it. Until then though, I would be stuck with her impulsive tendencies.

I glared at her craning my neck to look up, was I really that tall? Compared to her tiny body I felt like I was David taking on the Giant. I wondered if she acknowledged the fact that she was completely and utterly breakable? She just brushed it off and took on the world anyway.

I laughed out loud as her memory lowered it's guard ever so slightly. Before my eyes like an old reeling tape of film appeared a memory. Helga was standing her foot over a boy's chest. I remembered this too and was interested in her perspective. I was still shorter and slightly smaller then her puberty only just around the corner. Even so the boy on the ground was a large seventh grader that I had even felt intimidation from when he cornered me.

"_Look here jerk only I get to punk Blondie over there got it!" Her pink bow bobbing with her head as she pointed behind her shielding me from the seventh grader. _

"_Oh look we got a tough guy brawler over here." The bully taunted Helga as she pressed her foot down roughly. _

"_No, it's the Irish in me. Consider me being cultural by not taking your crap." She snapped back witty. _

_He pulled out from under her staggering to his feet towering over both of them. Helga glared on unwavering in her courage. _

"_Whatever; try having some class, you're just a tom boy, try being a girl and maybe someone would actually want to be your boyfriend." He laughed staring Helga up and down from her Pink bow, to her matching dress, and white sneakers. This time I felt how badly the boy had hurt her she knew she wasn't pretty. Feeling this thought with her for the first time angered me. Helga was quirky but always pretty. If she hadn't been, edgy or not, she wouldn't have been a super model like she'd once been. The boy took off in a fit of laughter and I felt her shame as she wiped the tears away before I could take notice. I had never told Helga but I had taken notice anyway. _

"_You know in Mythology Athena; the Goddess of Knowledge and War is in fact a "girl", and described as a pretty one at that." It was strange hearing my slightly high cracking voice. I hadn't realized how much that had lightened her heart. I grabbed her hand squeezing it tight as I pulled her along behind me. "Nothing wrong with being a protector once in a while; it doesn't always have to be a guy, come on." Where are we going," she asked excited. "For a banana split and ladies eat free." Arnold promised. "Oh, Arnold if you wanted a free sundae you could've just asked." She teased and I nudged her playfully. "Whatever you say Helga," I countered as we rushed to the ice-cream parlor my hand still steering her to the store. _

The memory flickered away and I was back to my surroundings no longer looking at my eleven-year-old self but; a seventeen- year-old that was huge in comparison to that childhood image. Helga's body still felt warm fuzzies from the memory. It was strange, I couldn't explain it in a phrase if I tried, and it appeared Helga's body had shown me the memory because it had learned to associate whom my soul was.

Helga's body had shared the memory in acceptation of sharing occupancy space with me. It seemed Helga's mind had called a truce. The pit of my stomach didn't turn anymore and I actually felt kind of hungry. My sinuses clearing up as I smelt her natural pleasant wildflower scent better then if I were standing up close and personal. I sighed happily just relieved that the aches and sores were gone. I could get through these two weeks now that Helga's body wasn't trying to snuff my soul out. I looked over at my own body arms crossed and quite defensive. On second thought, it was going to be a long couple weeks. I had over come Helga's mind; could I with stand the torture of her soul too?

Helga opened my mouth wide ready to make a comment when an unexpected shout rose into the still warm air. "Aye you, where's the boss's money!" Both Helga and I snapped our heads towards the voice that I already knew too well. Right before our eyes was Franky G. A classic Italian mobster man. He pressed his square sunglasses further up his long pointed nose as his skinny legs raced towards us. Only stopping to spit on the ground. It could

I had known he was trouble since hanging out with him once as a boy. Even back then he'd attempted to recruit me in the crime scene. He'd needed my back then oddly shaped head to go through a window and bust a B&E. I needed the financial help though. Though the tasks Franky G. and the crew had me execute were wrong I had no choice. Sometimes we have to break bad in order to make good. Sometimes a little wrong went a long way into a lot of good. I owed the boss money though. I had it at my house but right now I was in a bit of a circumstance that I found more important then the boss's check. We needed to make a run for it and fast!

"He's after me!" both Helga and I hollered at the same time. "He's after you?" We both repeated with alarm. I needed to run but I was floored as another one of Helga's uncontrollable memories charged at me. She was in trouble with the boss, her A game slipping, they needed Helga to toughen up. Franky G. shook Helga punching her in the jaw as she staggered back. The memory evaporated as quickly as it had fluttered to the surface of thought. Arnold pressed his fingers lightly to her jaw now understanding the bruising he'd felt there all morning.

"Run!" Helga hollered yanking me up to carry. Before I knew it she'd thrown me over her newly found broad shoulders. "Why is he after you? I thought you were papa Teresa. I guess your more into a Robin Hood act now huh? Steal from the rich and give to the poor Arnold-o?" She mocked as she breathed heavily still carrying me in her arms. "Come back here you twos!" Franky G. exclaimed as he rounded the corner on his motorbike. Luckily a bus made its pit stop and we both hopped on it hastily.

We both sat in the back sweating and heaving our chests for fresh air. "Explain!" we both demanded in unison. Something signaled to me that the whole situation just got a lot more complicated. First switching bodies, then getting mixed up in the mob, what was next? Nothing worse could happen right? Maybe I should knock on wood or buy a rabbit paw. Even with my knack for making things work I may crossed paths with an issue that I could not embrace nor resolve. Could I make it two weeks? That was even if I could make it back to the Gypsy in two weeks. I cursed, as Helga had put it: I cursed the gypsy for pulling a "freaky Friday," on us. This was not an adorable Disney channel skit and I was growing more and more uncertain of a happy ending as each minute of the body swap passed.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter Three

Serial Killer

Arnold and I had caught a bus and escaped our hit man. We were in a dubious situation with the swapping of our bodies as well as being chased for major debts. Neither one of us had yet to speak about why we were both indebted to the Hillwood mob. In fact as soon as the bus let off Arnold ditched me leaving me stranded in his flesh and confused as ever. I had called my cell phone a million times with not a single text or response the last three days. Neither of us had attended school either. Phoebe and Gerald were worried for us but we both continued to ignore them along with ourselves.

Just when I was loosing hope of ever figuring out where Arnold would wander off to his mind surfaced a memory for me. It seemed he'd had a plan on how to pay back the gang chasing us all along. There was a state wide singing competition. He was going to enter his raps with Gerald. I knew though he resided in my body he would still attempt at the million-dollar prize and record deal. With that I hurried to the theatre hoping I wasn't too late. No way no matter how much money it was worth would I allow him to enter me into such public scrutiny.

I paid my ticket scrounging change out of Arnold's blue jeans. I rushed inside the theatre. My jaw dropped, I was too late in fact Arnold was standing on stage. My fists clenched in a rage when I got my hands on him I was about to make him a woman beater. There for the whole audience to gawk at I stood like a pin up model. I wore a tight hot pink corset that pushed my cleavage to the point that you could see my every bated breath. My hair in elegant pin curls and I was certain Arnold had not done my hair but that he'd somehow had convinced Phoebe. I wore black fishnets that covered my thighs leaving the men in the audience to imagine what may lie underneath them. He'd topped off the outfit with stiletto black boots. Sex sells I thought bitterly.

He slowly walked up to the microphone. He cleared my body's dainty feminine throat. I shoved people out of the way with brute male strength as I forced my way to the front of the stage. I was in perfect view of him and he me. He glanced at me then continued to ignore me.

"Hello ladies and gentleman. My name is Helga Pataki. I had a different song planned for you tonight. However do to my circumstantial changes I have decided to go with my gut. There will be a few word changes for me but this song was going to be my original debut." I watched as my own face lit up in a pleasant grin. Even confined in my body his eyes still half lidded as he curled my lip into a smirk. I knew by lyrical changes he meant his words would be in a gender reversal, instead of speaking a man to a woman to play off his new female position he would switch the lyrics around as if he were talking about a man. Only I knew his song was for a woman.

"See in the past I have had many chase after me." In his minds eye I examined as several exes appeared before me from his memory. I bit my tongue tasting blood rather jealous.

"However, there is only one who I ever truly loved." Mystery woman flashed behind my eyelids momentarily disappearing before I could get a good view of her. I hated this girl, this girl who had stolen his love from me!

"This one is for you. I love you." I watched as my body leaned forward blowing a seductive kiss to the audience.

"Wish I may, wish I might, Find my one true love tonight. Do you think that he, Could be you?" I was stunned as he took my vocal cords to a heavenly soprano that I didn't even know existed within myself.

If I pray really tight, Get into a fake bar fight, While I'm walking down, The avenue.

If I lay really quiet, I know that what I do isn't right, I can't stop what I, Love to do!" Gerald stood as Arnold's DJ adding a drum beat and warping through the microphone Arnold's words occasionally, pumping up the crowds energy.

"So I murder love in the night, Watching them fall one by one they fight, Do you think you'll, Love me too, ooh, ooh?" I watched as my head tilted up to the ceiling moaning lightly to the beat. Arnold lost in his lyrics I knew in his mind he was beside her singing to her and it only served to fuel my furry.

"Baby, I'm a sociopath, Sweet serial killer. On the warpath, 'Cause I love you, Just a little too much.

I love you just, A little too much. (Much, much, much)." My voice hissed the echoing word much enchantingly as my body swayed to the rhythm, dancing passionately touching my waist sensually, as if my lover danced beside me. I watched as my body spun across the stage in a solo romantic ballad. The audience stood dancing to the music surrounding me as I stood the only person unmoved my Arnold's warped love ballad.

"(You send me right to heaven), Sweet serial killer, (I guess I'll see him over)." My lips whispered lustfully as I lowered lifting my dainty wrists to my head lying on the stage floor lost in the song. Arnold's body pulled magnetically towards my image on the stage. I was so close I could reach his hand out to touch my own.

"Do it for the thrill of the rush, Love you just a little too much, much.

(You send me right to heaven), Sweet serial killer, (I guess I'll see him over). I love you just a little too much, Love you just a little too much, much. My black fire's burning bright, Maybe I'll go out tonight. We can paint the town, In blue."

Arnold's mind flashed a million memories with her exploring the inner workings of Hillwood. I rubbed at the temples of my new body frustrated desperate to know who this woman was. Who out of what seemed to be millions had been the sole winner of his heart? Why out of all the sweet tender girls had he chosen the single one who appeared to be his sole destruction? I just couldn't wrap my head around it all.

"I'm so hot, I ignite, Dancing in the dark and I shine. Like a light I'm, luring you.

Sneak up on you, really quiet, Whisper "am I what your heart desires?" I could be your, Ingenue."

I watched as my body quivered crawling towards my vision. It took a moment for me to catch up to Arnold's physical senses. My body had crawled across the stage and had snatched Arnold's shirt by the collar to tauntingly whisper the last statement into his ear. The crowd went wild whistling and hollering in excitement. I merely looked down wide-eyed at the petite pale hand gripping my blue sweater. Again I had an override of senses unable to desciper what emotions were my own soul and which were Arnold's physicality's responding to "Helga's" antics.

"Keep you safe, and inspired, Baby, let your fantasies unwind. We can do what you, Want to do, ooh, ooh."

He felt a need to protect this woman I could feel his primal masculine need for her wash over him.

"You can see me, Drinking cherry coke, Sweet serial killer. I left a love note, said you know I love the thrill of the rush.

You know I love the thrill of the rush. (Rush, rush, rush).

(You send me right to heaven), Sweet serial killer,

(I guess I'll see him over). Do it for the thrill of the rush, Love you just a little too much, much.

(You send me right to heaven), Sweet serial killer, (I guess I'll see him over). I love you just a little too much, Love you just a little too much, much.

(Just have fun), wanna, Play you like a game boy. (Don't want one), what's, The thrill of the same toy? La la, la la la, la la, La la lie down, down."

Her lips brushing his raced across my mind like an ancient piece of film. So they'd been intimate before! I hated every aspect of this situation. Most of all I hated listening and feeling his body gravitate towards desire in a wanton need for her. I hated first hand feeling his undying love for this stranger. I just wanted back into my own flesh and bone. I wanted everything for once in my existence to be normal. I was the only individual left uninspired by this moving soul evoking love song. In fact, I was revolted by it!

(Just have fun), wanna, Play you like a game boy. (Don't want one), what's, The thrill of the same toy? La la, la la la, la la, La la lie down, down, down.

Ugh.

You can see me, Drinking cherry coke, Sweet serial killer. I left a love note, said you know I love the thrill of the rush.

You know I love the thrill of the rush. (Rush, rush, rush).

(You send me right to heaven), Sweet serial killer,

(I guess I'll see him over). Do it for the thrill of the rush, Love you just a little too much, much.

(You send me right to heaven), Sweet serial killer, (I guess I'll see him over). I love you just a little too much, Love you just a little too much, much."

The chorus faded off as the crowd went insane. I watched as my slender physic lifted on her feet bowing as men threw roses at her feet. I wasn't going to tolerate any more of this nonsense. I was going to go backstage and kick my own ass! Then I was going to insist he tell me how he'd gotten into so much trouble and explain what happened to my noble knight in shining armor. After that we'd figure out how to swap bodies back. Above all else though on the top of my list was forcing out of him who this bizarre sizzling love was for. I knew in the end it would shatter my soul but I had to know who she was once and for all. First the I-pod and now this performance. I knew it shouldn't be my top priority but unveiling her identity in my heart of hearts made top of the list.


End file.
